At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
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