if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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