***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Randomize
