So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
