She said her name was "party"
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Randomize
