Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
So much Jack, so little girl.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
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