I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
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