This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
