Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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