Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
I pour the whiskey from now on
Randomize
