so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize