just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
