i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
