Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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