"it" just moved
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Randomize
