Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize