Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
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