bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
