I'm lost and stupid without you.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
i will never coherently bang her
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Randomize
