What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
