I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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