dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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