found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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