Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
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