i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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