haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Randomize
