You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize