i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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