just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
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