Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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