She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
