Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.

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  (781): I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore. http://tfl.nu/ktqn
  Replies (8) Good night (2145) Bad night (714)
• Favorite

  (386): View more from Florida

  First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.

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  (386): First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook. http://tfl.nu/2gux
  Replies (12) Good night (5042) Bad night (550)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.

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  (505): He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes. http://tfl.nu/z1l1
  Replies (25) Good night (780) Bad night (3405)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.

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  (201): i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds. http://tfl.nu/tub0
  Replies (12) Good night (3103) Bad night (756)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair

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  (978): vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair http://tfl.nu/uyhj
  Replies (5) Good night (2721) Bad night (868)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."

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  (603): U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite." http://tfl.nu/bn94
  Replies (6) Good night (3787) Bad night (786)
• Favorite

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.

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  (504): He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom. http://tfl.nu/xop2
  Replies (2) Good night (1571) Bad night (1043)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it

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  (406): stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it http://tfl.nu/40em
  Replies (8) Good night (743) Bad night (2321)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.

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  (978): I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek. http://tfl.nu/dtfv
  Replies (5) Good night (1717) Bad night (788)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon

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  (480): Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon http://tfl.nu/8tqm
  Replies (3) Good night (747) Bad night (644)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.

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  (817): He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more. http://tfl.nu/2a37
  Replies (8) Good night (461) Bad night (1264)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!

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  (715): It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful! http://tfl.nu/m6vl
  Replies (1) Good night (684) Bad night (322)
• Favorite

  (580): View more from Oklahoma

  I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.

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  (580): I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her. http://tfl.nu/o5ak
  Replies (6) Good night (698) Bad night (317)
• Favorite

  (586): View more from Michigan

  You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?

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  (586): You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them? http://tfl.nu/w767
  Replies (2) Good night (811) Bad night (368)
• Favorite

  (989): View more from Michigan

  dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw

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  (989): dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw http://tfl.nu/cvdu
  Replies (3) Good night (542) Bad night (299)

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