But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
