So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
