I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
