Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
she was so not down for the gang bang
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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