Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk