I'm jealous of your bromance
Someone shit on the floor
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
Randomize