Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
