I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
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