Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Randomize