Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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