More tranny stories later!
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
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