Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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