guys are not supposed to queef...right?
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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