Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Randomize
