Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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