i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
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