I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
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