At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
